Let's help one another

I park my car in a lot opposite the Regency Intercontinental Hotel which is run by the National Foundation for the Disabled. All the money from the car park goes to the charity and it even employs disabled people; it's a good cause that sometimes goes unnoticed.

I've been parking in the lot since June 2008 and now know the regulars who work there, a good bunch of lads who like to chat European football and always have a smile on their faces. They're forever friendly, even when they think they're done for the day and I drive up, apologetic to be waking them from their sleep to let me go - did I mention it's a 24 hour car park and there's always someone there? They do a good job those lads, they do a really good job.

I don't mind paying over BD2 a day when I know my money is going to a good cause. I received their publication appropriately named "Benevolence" (or "A'ataa" in Arabic) , a magazine with a variety of topics and news updates on different charity events and it's gotten me thinking of how else I can help.

I trawl the newspapers for upcoming events that I could participate in but I seem to be reading about events ended and not much that's coming up. I know the Internet is not the best place to look, but I'm sure there's a website or a publication that shows upcoming events and how you can participate that I haven't found yet. I've heard that now that the summer is coming up, things will quiet down so this may not be the best time to be active - or maybe it is? I have a demanding job that doesn't give me much time off, but I'm still keen to do something in my spare time when possible. Every little bit helps I suppose, even if it takes a while to find the people you want to help and organise the most beneficial way to go about it - as long as you get there eventually and you make a difference, big or small.

So, if anyone knows of a charity event or organisation that needs help, please let me know, because I'd like to contribute in any way possible. Post any events, organisations or even your interest in a comment: the more we spread the word, the more interest we can gather and the more people we can help out, in one way or another.

And if you happen to park in the lot opposite the Regency Hotel, give those lads some recognition. Like I said, they're a good bunch, even if they do support Chelsea.

Easy updates, Ea-sy

• I'm consumed at work and it's going well. I have dreams that my clients are in big trouble and I solve all their problems. They pronounce me their hero and have a parade with me on a float and confetti everywhere (it's a nice dream).
• I like work here, it's good quality stuff but I miss London. I miss the office and seeing so many people every day. I miss the bigger picture of it all and unfortunately there's not much I can do about it. Luckily everyone here has been very nice to me and has made me feel welcome - almost as if I've been here for months on end. There are still many things that I miss and wish I could go back to but I will try not to think about them too much and make the most of what I've got on my plate - which is quite a lot, Thanks Godness.
• I like to read aloud the stickers on people's cars.
• I like spending time with Mr. Seroo, it's nice being in the same country again. It makes me happy.
• I still don't understand how time here either gozza by so slowly or flies. I still haven't settled into a good regime and really want to get a good system going where I make the most of my time and spend every minute wisely. I need to fit reading, exercising and alone time back into my days.
• I had a problem with my cargo. The moving company in the UK picked my stuff up from my flat and promised to put it on the next day flight to Bahrain. I kept calling them from Bahrain and they lied for 10 days and said my stuff was "in transit". When I called a little exasperated they confessed my things still hadn't left the UK and were already damaged. After much shouting over the telephone and fist banging on my desk, I sorted everything out and got all my stuff. I'm still sifting through everything to assess the levels of damage, but so far, so good.
• I went to an art exhibition by high school students and I have to say I was very impressed. For real, these kids are really talented and so bold with their work, I was taken aback by the levels of creativity I was seeing. A lot of the work was very smart and it was so refreshing to see the kind of crazy angles that were taken - older generation art students would have never been able to create stuff like this, it was whacky cool. I'm telling you, things are changing in a cool way for kids nowadays.
• I still haven't had a Jan Burger. I know, I know, say what you want but I'm no traitor - I'll sort it out and be in Double Jan heaven soon enough.

For how long? Indefinitely...

That's a lie: I took the tube to the airport.

It took one decision and one week for me to pack up my life for the last seven years and leave London behind. The one decision was based on work, and of course, as if anyone could expect any different, I was back in the office the day after I arrived. Hardcore.

I've been busy at work, will be busier as I think I've been given some leeway on my first week back and have been able to go home at a reasonable hour to spend time with family and friends (and Fiance of course!). Being busier will be good, I hope that it helps my "transition" into being back here and give me some time to "adjust".

Coming back was a big surprise to many people, especially Fiance whose jaw dropped open when he saw me walk through the door - the look on his face was priceless. Many are more surprised this could be "for good". Hmmm. Let's see how that goes.

I already miss my old life behind that I didn't get a chance to say goodbye to properly. Friends and favourite places still visit me in my few hours of sleep every night to tell me that they're carrying alright without me but if I need to come back they'll take me in. The Bridge misses me, or so it swears...

So now that I'm back, I will slowly give myself some time to put together my big plans and build things up for myself, maybe even to relax a little, if possible.

Here's to seeing a few of you around.

Ally McBeal wasn't anorexic, was she?

Being a women lawyer has its pressures. It's very competitive and you give up a lot of things like your social life, time with your boyfriend or husband, everyday errands, not having grey hair, sleep. For me, one thing I stopped doing regularly was exercising, which is proof of the terrible, terrible world I live in. Going to the gym becomes something you talk about but deep down inside you know you never do ("3 times a week" you say when you really mean "3 times in the last 3 months") and you really start to feel terrible, especially when there's nothing you can do about it. I think I'm an active person: I will always walk if I have the choice rather than take transport and I like going to the gym, but lately that hasn't been the case and I've really been feeling it. Working in a city law firm isn't helping this ill feeling either, especially as I realised quite early on that there are only a few overweight female lawyers: Everyone looks fabulous and frankly, I just don't see how everyone can stay in such great shape.

When I first started, I was constantly in awe of the waif like creatures that floated around the office in their Dolce and Gabbanna silk shirts and Dior pumps. They would all turn their heads elegantly towards me to smile while I loitered nervously outside their offices for the horrors of more work. I would stand there, self conscious in my boxy suit while they crossed their pencil skirted pencil legs or lifted heavy boxes with their (deceptively strong) twig-like arms. How did they look so good? Fair enough, most of these model-like female lawyers were not junior lawyers (therefore have gotten used to the type of work and frazzle of it all), but if they were in the office with me at half past nine in the evening, when did they have time to take care of themselves, i.e. work out? They were always so perfectly presented, and moreover, they were were all "skinny".

Bar two of the junior staff who were edging on the curvy side, there are no "fat" female lawyers in my firm. These observations took months to reach a conclusion and I believe that after looking at a large number of successful, young, female lawyers, I can concur that almost all of them are slim. Most of the young female solicitors in my firm of a certain rank and above are even quite "skinny"; no matter how drab their suit jacket may be, tiny waists and prominent collar bones are abundant in the office. They all look extremely busy, too, running around, getting things done (what I would consider "corporate cardio"). Perhaps it's the stress, I thought to myself, that makes the weight drop off. Everyone was fairly busy, there were very stressful times, so perhaps with all the madness your metabolism goes up a few notches and you start burning fat like an Iranian kebab shop. This puzzled me, since most of the men seemed to be well fed, so why were most of the the women "skinny"? Surely no matter how stressful it got, you would still break for lunch and dinner, or give into that mind-block-chocolate-craving that everyone gets just before 4 o'clock...

I saw these Skinnies step into lifts during lunchtime or leave the canteen, but soon I realised I never saw them eat. You see, there were times where I spent many a late night in my office building with my only real companions being the other junior lawyers who were slaving away and the canteen staff. Come a certain time of night, I would ring the other young 'uns to see who was up for some grub: If I was still at work at 8 p.m. and it wasn't looking like I was going to be going to a homecooked supper anytime soon, I wanted to make sure I got a square meal in me right away. This was my logic, if I was still working at this time, I was entitled to take a break with some food and have all the high trans-fats cheesy trimmings I wanted. I would pile my tray high with whatever hot dinner was at offer (Lancashire hotpots and pasta bakes of the sorts) and sit down to wolf if all down in less than 20 minutes. In the mean time, I would watch the Emma's and Chloe's float in, pick up some fruit and float out. There were exceptions, some did pick up trays of hot food like me (the roast potatoes, oh the horror of carbs past 6 p.m.!) and even though I would smugly watch them sit down and pick up their forks and knives, I never saw more than a few bites go into their delicate little mouths. The rest of their 16 minutes would be spent poking and prodding at their plates until it was time to go back up to their desks, and with a knowing smile sent my way, I would wipe my plate clean of any traces of my canteen dinner and wonder how they do it.

Soon enough, I found myself inspecting my side profile in the bathroom mirrors far too many times in the day and becoming very body conscious. I too wanted to become a hard working, female lawyer climbing the ranks in a City firm, I too wanted to become "skinny." This was not good, considering I have average BMI and was never one to scrutinise my body. Suddenly, I was always digging for skirts in the morning to show my defined calves and erase the illusion of plank legs I was sure the other lawyers all had of me. I wanted to look the part, walk the walk, talk the assertive talk. I, too, wanted to skip meals when working around the clock for Client X's refinancing model or when Client Hippo's demands were my main priority, not my afternoon snacks of sugary treats.

I tried, I really did, but my stummy would cry out infront of my supervisers. "Maltesers, they're only 190 calories per pack" I would say, sneaking down to the tuck shop to pick up 3 packets of the said treats, a Diet Coke and a Geobar (I hear they're good for you). Along with your usual array of KitKats and Yorkies, our tuck shop is also equipped with all the right treats to keep you trim, with calorie indexes on everything and plenty of shiny apples to make your eyes sparkle like a horse at the Derby. Being a City firm, we also have your usual corporate coffee stand for your obligatory morning paper cup coffee: I would gallantly march my way in the queue to place my louder than usual order of "One 'Skinny' Latte, please", only to have my barrista answer back "All our lattes are "Skinny", Miss". You could not even be served full fat milk if you wanted it, you all had to aim to be "Skinny". All of you. Every, single, one of you.

My current supervisor, an exposed chocoholic, has been a great help by stealing any chocolate I leave at my desk, albeit not very sneakily as I always manage to catch him in the act of scoffing the end of whatever sad soldier I've left behind. If it's going to help me get to that high powered job in my size 0 pencil skirt, I won't say a peep, after all, being skinny and successful go hand it hand it seems in big city firms. Also, golden rule number 1 of working in a law firm is never deny your supervisor of anything on your desk, especially if you want to keep your job.

Perhaps I am looking too far into it and that it is just by coincidence that my firm hires pretty, "skinny" lawyers and sees potential in the younger, "chunky" ones. Already I have noticed a few baggy shirts and loose trousers amongst some of the girls from my intake, even though I do not witness it in myself. I can only pray that I do not remain as the exception to the rule as one of the few "chunky" ones that sticks out like a sore thumb in our group photos.

* The contents of this web site may contain offensive material towards lawyers and not-skinny people. The owner of this website has made all reasonable efforts to ensure that all information provided in or through this website is complete and accurate at the time of inclusion. However, there may be inadvertant and occasional errors and omissions, for which the owner of this website apologises. The owner of this website makes no representations or warranties about the accuracy or completeness of the information provided through this website and reserves the right to publish this information. The owner of this website accepts no liability for any direct or indirect damages or any other losses or other liability whatsoever resulting from whatever cause through any person's access or inability to access tihs website, or through the use of, and/or reliance upon any informaiton obtained either directly or indirectly from this website. Because frankly, if you were in my shoes, you'd probably be touchy about not being skinny, too, and just want to cover your own ass.

My life at the moment

Clearly since my life recently has just been about my work, I haven't had much to say, or perhaps a better way to put it is that I just haven't had the time to sit down and blag away here so I've had to resort to showing you some measley photos I've taken and hope that it will suffice as an explanation of what it is I am up to at the moment.

Which as you can see, isn't much.

My phone.

My afternoon snack.

My walk in the morning.

My view leaving the office.

Maybe I'll do a camera phone "day in the life" as inspired by Twix. That could do it for me.

almost there...

Au Revoir

It's a sad day in my b'sphere. Today I have to say goodbye to the feeling of anticipation of reading new posts by someone I really admired, for many reasons, as he will no longer be writing in his blog. Your rants and raves will be missed, funny man.

Let's wave our farewell to our dear friend over here.

See you soon x

I am dusting off my Chipmunk's Christmas Special CD as we speak...

Jinga ling ling, Christmas time is coming up. The lights are up, shoppers are going crazy and all is jolly and merry in the air. As I sit, wrapped in my scarf in this cold glass building, I sneak peeks at the Christmas fair that has gone up outside Potters Field and feel a bit better about the winter chill... Little children appear out of no where (don't they have school to go to?) and everyone rushes out in their lunch break to buy some mince pies and Christmas cards. The best thing about winter in this country is Christmas time, the whole city lights up and there's something special in the air... I love watching the lights go up, this year I especially like the Art Deco lights of Regent's street and not very impressed by Oxford Street this year. I am certainly most impressed by the decorations in our flat...

Our tree was bought last year when my flatmate went out to get a "small little jobbie from Waitrose" and came back with a huge 6 foot (fake) tree with a trunk full of decorations. She had a sparkle in her eye and infected me with Christmasitis, we had a ball putting up decorations. I always liked Christmas decorations, but I suppose coming from a place where we don't really celebrate Christmas I was initially shocked by how far my flatemate goes to decorate the flat. I'm not just talking christmas lights, a tree and some baubles - I'm talking mini little snow topped cottages on our tree skirt and plushy beefeaters, as well as a few Christmas doggy ornaments and the special coffee mugs that come out every winter. Every night we get a chance to settle on the couch to watch some tv, the first thing we do is put on the Christmas lights on the window, light up the tree, and then sit in the relatively dark living room to relax. We always have to have the tree up before SinterKlaas (my flatmate is Belgian) and we must on the night of the 5th of December put out a carrot and a drink for Santa and his horse (yes, we're not 4, but before she wakes up I make sure there are some chocolate gold coins in my flatmate's shoes... and to my surprise, when I wake up the carrot and drink are gone! Must be a Christmas miracle...).

In the office there hasn't been much of a Christmas feel until today - the day of our Christmas Ball. The jolly admin staff have already sent around an email to notify us that we cannot ruin our brand new building in any way, so we are not allowed to hang Christmas decorations - well, at all. I mean, we can put some our desks but what fun is that? Let me tell you, the secretaries are not pleased.... This means nothing from the ceiling, no fake snow on the windows, no snow flakes or little christmas teddies anywhere. I understand it's not professional, but come on... it's Christmas... and if I can't have office decorations, well then Ricky Gervais lied to me in The Office. Hmph. Scrooges.

This is our busiest time of year in my department so I haven't had much time to do any Christmas shopping or go to a Christmas Fayre, but I will make time soon enough. Although last year I had the pleasure of spending Christmas with two of my dearest friends, I've opted to go back home and spend this time of year with my family, especially my nieces. If anything, Christmas is for them (how funny for me to say "them" and not "her"... there's two of them now!) so I want to go back and just be with them... I now wonder what I would have done if I had to spend Christmas here alone (probably working) - Although it is a lovely time of year, it's the most lonely if you'd have to spend it by yourself and that I am not planning on doing... No sirree...

And while we're at it, I feel like I should put up my Christmas Wishlist for those of you who are stuck for ideas:

1. An iPod that will not die after a few months of serious usage, can hold all my photos, my music, tell me the weather, pull up maps of dingy side streets when I'm lost, look pretty... basically, an iPhone.
2. Sunshine in a jar. Comme ca.
3. Some nice leather boots
4. Perhaps a nice handbag to go along with my nice leather boots
5. A Castle (or for those on a budget, the pink Sheera castle I had when I was a kid needs to be replaced)
6. A baby grand piano
7. Gift certificates for John Lewis (sensible aren't I?)

Let's all get into the spirit now... xxx

Absolutely Gutted

Yes you twat, cry.... hold your umbrella and sob because after tonight's performance, I really don't see how you'll be keeping your job... You may not want to resign but you'll definitely think about it when you come home to a trashed house and your car on fire...

It is completely your fault England have not qualified tonight... they played appallingly tonight... 4-3-3? What were you thinking? Why? And then watching Crouch play alone oh my... He may have scored the second goal but what were you thinking.... The whole team was absolute rubbish...

Carson... my oh my oh my... I don't think there's anything I can say that hasn't been said already...

I'm so upset... I can't believe we were clinging on to Andorra as our last chance to equalise against Russia... Andorra who haven't made it in the last 29 years were supposed to score a goal for us and they couldn't come through... All fairness to Andorra, they probably weren't as horrible as England tonight...

So much I can say but I think I should go to bed... goodnight...

Out and about: London Jazz Festival

I really needed to chill out. Predicting a peak in what one could call emotional instability, I sent an email to a friend with a link -"jazz at lunchtime?" - to which she was quick to agree to meet on Sunday at Waterloo ready to switch off and just chill out. The long sunny week passed and when Sunday came, the weather was horrible and we had to walk far too long to get a cup of coffee, but when we finally got to the Royal Festival Hall and saw the dim light stage, we relaxed. After finding a proper seat, I slipped into a stream of rhythm and forgot about my worries and my doubts...

We attended a performance consisting of 3 of England's top contemporary jazz bands in the Southbank Centre and although we only got to see one band, it was well worth it. The band consisted of a piano, saxophone, trumpet, bass and the drums and the composition of the music was very young, very vibrant and very, very good.

The nice thing about listening to contemporary jazz bands is the different ways of integrating each individual sound together. In the band we saw, there was no singer - which I prefer only because I tend to focus on the instruments rather than the singing (and usually the piano, just my own personal preference). The type of music that was being played wasn't the type that you could write lyrics to, let alone sing along to: any attempt to add any written words would have ruined it all for me personally. The final sound that came out together was just right for the audience of all ages and very current to today's tastes.

Some people don't like this particular style of music because they don't find it uniform enough and hard to follow - there's no obvious bridge or scale and can sound off key. Every instrument plays a different role which on the surface doesn't seem like it goes with the rest of the band - for instance, the piano player sounds like she's constantly hitting the wrong keys while the trumpet sounds like it would be better off alone. But what's great is that once you dissect each instrument and musician by himself, that is a song in itself - and every musician was playing to the same subtle tune. In one song, each musician had a solo in which at the end of the mini performances, when they all came together, the song made sense and you appreciated each musical contribution separately.

Some people also think that this sort of music requires a lot of improvising from the musician. I have to disagree with this because although it may sound like a lot of improvising (what may sound like a lot of mistakes, a lot of missed keys) - a lot of the time, it's actually not. After paying attention to a whole song, you'll notice the pattern of the music that really requires talent by someone who is trained in that genre.

As I said, I tend to focus on the piano if there is one because it's my favourite instrument so my eyes were glued to the pianists fingers - she was incredible, and I could tell it was from a lot of practice to refine that particular song. A lot of funky finger rolling was going on and I was just in awe, which also made me appreciate the rest of the band because the music wasn't all in the piano - the whole band was extremely talented and I could see why they were one of the best contemporary jazz bands of the country at the moment.

Although I really love the piano, I much prefer listening to a jazz band than one musician. There is talent in playing a musical instrument but there is far more talent in synchronizing your music with someone else's, especially in a genre like this. The band was very good and very original - they avoided the whole mainstream jazz scene which is exactly what I wanted to hear. It was a good end to the week and a much needed change from the norm - I'm hoping to catch another performance soon so long as I'm not stuck in my office building too often...

The London Jazz Festival will be on until Sunday the 25th of November with events on every day. Events at the Southbank Centre can be seen here.

Forster Gallery

You can buy me the prints. All of them.

Back to London tonight

In a bullet proof vest
With the windows all closed
I'll be doing my best

And I'll see you soon

In a telescope lens
And when all you want is friends
I'll see you soon

- See You Soon, Coldplay

I love/hate you ESPN

I'm not an athletic person at all. I have no competitive streak in me. The only physical exercise I partake in is jogging and I've never been in a marathon of any sort. I was never the kid that got picked last in gym class, I was just the kid that was never there. I just didn't care for playing any competitive games at all. But still, I think I can say I understand sports.

Growing up, I never interfered with football games on TV or the strange language of baseball players between my brothers. I got it - sports are important to men and that's just the way it is. It never bothered me, I never thought of it. When I went to college, I even became an avid football supporter - I became the girl who jumped on her chair and screamed in the face of a rival team's supporter when my team won an important game (Vimmel, if you ever read this, I'm not sorry). Still, I never went to play footie with the boys or try my hand at squash or hockey and at the same time I never dismissed any of it as being unimportant to anyone. I valued how people felt about sports.

Towards the end of my college years, I met this guy and I kinda liked him. He was pretty cool; he was smart, funny, down to earth, a bit of a geek, listened to some cool indie music. He was also a crazy sports fan and I thought that was pretty cool too. I actually thought it was important to like a guy who liked sports, because it gave him something to feel passionately about. Not so cool that he felt so passionately about my team's rival football team, but I pushed that aside. He had other good qualities in him. So I didn't think too much of it.

Soon enough, I started dating this guy. The first week of our official courting we spent watching Euro 2004. Our first summer was spent explaining the rules of the NFL and rugby. The rest of our courtship was filled with endless football games, international competitions and even lazy days watching darts (Phil the Power Taylor and his arch nemeses Scholten). I didn't really mind, I was pretty easy going about it. I toned down my hooligan ways and let him explain things to me I pretended I didn’t know already. It was sweet.

Me and the boyfriend then got engaged. Amazing, flowers everywhere, congratulatory wishes and everyone’s blessings. Things were great. Everyone was happy for us, we were especially happy. Boyfriend now becomes fiancé and is still ever as much a crazy sports fan. All is still cool.

Fiancées both move back home and back into their parents houses and fiancées want to live a happy engaged life together, as you do. But wait, how are we going to go about this fiancé business with all these sports on? I mean, the premier league is going to start soon... That will take away Saturdays and Sundays... Short after the Champions league will start too, so Tuesdays and Wednesdays are going to be written off as well... What now?

Male Fiancé gets an idea: He'll get a Showbox aka the-answers-to-all-my-problems-in-a-box-box. Showbox has a function where you can record TV shows to watch later a la sky plus. Excellent. No problems missing any important games. Perfect, perfect. I even call up Showtime to give them a shout so they can install his box faster, all in hopes that now we’ll be able to spend far more time together. Game’s on at 6 - that also coincides with dinner with all our friends for someone’s birthday that’s really in 3 weeks but we wanted to throw it now incase anyone travels at any point in between…? When this could have been an issue, it now was not a problem: we have the ShowDreambox…

Or so I thought.

Because then the inevitable happened. I mean, what was I thinking? That it was just going to end there? Here, let me set the timer for the United game today and then me and Fiancée can go back to being in love and… wait a minute, the Chelsea game’s playing too… Hmm… I should probably record that too… Wait, wait, I have to record the Liverpool game so I can taunt my best friend about it later… Hmmmm again… I wonder what else is on today…

You may think you got the picture but you really gotta try and picture it: Next thing it’s International friendlies. Then it’s Champion’s League games. Then it’s the Rugby World Cup. Then it’s anything where there’s people and a ball and screaming fan(s) and a whistle blown at the end and Fiancé going “Oh Wow it’s over” with a big sigh of relief like people did when someone big gave a speech or a war just ended. And guess what? If he could record them all, he would and he would spend all day indoors watching all the sports he can. Lucky for us, good-for-something-Showbox-box has a limit on how much you can record at the same time. Lucky us.

I thought I got it, I thought I understood sports. I mean, we even spent that summer watching the Ashes, remember? Wasn’t it nice? Couldn’t it have just ended there? I know that would have been asking for too much because I had to face reality: This was it, my fiancé is a sports lunatic. Fiancé has even asked that our wedding date does not clash with any major sporting events. And when I mockingly asked what game could be more important than our wedding day I should have known what would happen next: Fiancé’s silent blinking face stared at me as in his head he named all the major sporting events which he could not, under any circumstances, not even his wedding day, miss watching live.

I think I still get it, I think we’ve managed to work out a system in which we’re as happy as we can be. Sports are still being watched and fun stuff is still being done. We lay down the law as soon as we saw a potential conflict arise: Once I’m done with work, the remote control is dropped and we continue along our merry way. There are still many “but for’s”, but we’re managing pretty well so far.

I even let him read a bit of this post as I was writing it last night. He was watching some footie and flipping through the flip-through ART sports channel and he asked to read what I was typing. See, I told myself, he’s doesn’t completely zone out when the football’s on. I propped up the laptop and showed him what I was saying about him, I wanted to make sure he thought it wasn’t too inappropriate, writing out our private lives and all… In short, when he stopped reading out loud and snapped his head back to the TV screen, I knew that this wasn’t going to be a problem. I almost expected it to happen. And rather than get angry, I just laughed and finished writing this post.

There are a lot of girls that like sports. I enjoy watching sports on TV, I like the rush. I get in the spirit. But I also learned that I have other priorities in life that make sports take a back seat after a while. Men don’t really have that and I think women don’t really understand it. My only piece of advice to all girls out there is to humour them. Don’t pretend to be into it if you’re heart’s not in it, but don’t let it get to you either. It’s just sports. Don’t ever say that to your male companion either. Just find the funny side to it. Because when your fiancé starts listing sporting events that cannot, under any circumstances, coincide with your wedding day, all you can do then is laugh. Or call me up and I’ll laugh for the both of us.

1 Ramadhan 1428

God works in mysterious ways...

My summer island hopping (Bahrain is an archipelago after all)

It has been a hot summer here and I did not anticipate it to be otherwise. Hot, sticky and humid. It has been a nice summer.

I could have only guessed my stay here would fly by with days in the office and nights fluttering between one social event to the next. Weekends were spent with my family and his family and their family and then at various dinner parties eating Thai tidbits until 2 months flew by. I carelessly counted the days until reality told me my time here is coming to an end and soon I'll be back on the outside looking into a world I forgot I was a part of.

It's been a good summer because I love Bahrain. I love hanging out with my family and my childhood friends. I love cocktail Kuwaiti from Burair and drive-thru everything. I love the simple life here that can get you as far as you need. It's great, isn't it? My friends abroad leave me jealous facebook messages on how sunny life must be here and how wonderful it all is.

What I don't tell them is that after a whole summer here I've now got an itch that no matter how much I scratch will not go away. Who was I kidding, a whole summer here and I was expected to stay sane? With no special exhibitions in museums, no parks, no outdoors activities, no long walks, no intellectual stimulation, no anything new and no character to anything around me, was I supposed to be just fine and not feel useless?

I may have been working since day 2 of being back but I've just felt generally lazy this summer. I can't pinpoint what it was and I feel pangs of guilt everytime I try to break it down, but it just might be that I tried too hard to transition into life here and it wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. I miss being outdoors and exploring, I miss going for a run and then having a day jam packed with things to do. I miss being busy with "that sort of life" that a lot of people here just don't understand - "Miskeena" they say, shaking their heads "you're always running around, you don't have time to take care of yourself and relax"... all I can think is that maybe I like that kind of life...

I hated it when people said they "hate Bahrain" but I sympathise when people said it's "boring". It is boring and if you don't find ways to keep yourself busy it could drive you crazy. Life in Bahrain is far slower than many places in the world and if you don't accept it, you will go mad. I see people in Bahrain who are comfortable. They have their jobs, their social lives, their routines and it suits them just fine. I don't see myself there just yet. Where's the music, the art, the life? Or am I just being too ambitious?

And this is why I love London. I love every bit of it - even the mad bursts of sunshine in between rainy days, park lunches and all the media types of Soho. I love the side streets and the cafes, I love the Indian men in corner shops who drive Mercedes because they over charge you for a bottle of water and a Kitkat. I love the monuments, the benches, the Thames, I love everything about London. I love the Electric Ballroom and Harlem, kebab at Behesht and Kulfi from Brick Lane in Ramadhan. I'm itching to go back to the way things were when I was there... back to walking up long escalators and crossing streets like a real pedestrian. I miss our cafe nero and the beep of my oyster card, I miss shuffling through lines of slow people, I really miss it all... It's just my city and right now I feel like I need to go back.

Sometimes other Bahrainis talk about London and how much they love it, and I try not to get too possessive. I mean, not everyone knows where the best dim sum is or what it feels like to be attacked by a hobo. A lot of people don't know London overground or what buildings are teaching hospitals and elementary schools. Probably none of these people have ever worn mismatched clothes and gotten complimented on their outfit. Still, it's such a great city that it can be anyone's city - there's just so much to see and feel and taste and experience with all your senses and enough to go around for 11 million people at a time... Oh, I sigh as I write about London with a dreamy look on my face, I do love my city...

I love Bahrain but I miss my life in London. I miss being energetic, being arty for a day, being professional the next, being serious all morning and fun fun fun the rest of the time. I just haven't figured out how to bring that here.

Maybe what I need is to get away and reflect about all of this.

Maybe I'll do just that... 6 months in London again? Back to suiting, booting and commuting?

Perhaps that's exactly what I need...

On...

... Living at Home again ... Ups include never having to worry about dinner, never have trouble ironing a shirt and never running out of necessities you wouldn't always have in your home if you lived alone, like cotton wool or celotape. Downs include the obvious living at Home again - 'nuff said, I don't think I should elaborate anymore. I'm lucky to have supportive siblings who have also gone through this all so at least they don't argue back with me when I'm near throwing a tantrum (thanks guys).

... Working in Bahrain ... I'm really enjoying it, albeit it being very busy at the moment... A lot of people have told me before that "Bahrainis are lazy" but I can't really judge since I don't really work with any. So far, so good.


... Eating out in Bahrain ... Yum yum yum says my expanding waistline.

... Driving in Bahrain... What traffic jams? Or is this only because it's the summer time and lot's of people are on holiday? I don't get it... A'holes, however, I get and I don't like. Our GCC neighbours should not be welcome in our country no more.

... Shopping in Bahrain ... don't try and yawn through this one, Shopping here sucks... I miss boutiques, I miss market stalls, I miss unique affordable clothes... I walked into a boutique and picked up a caftan dress I loved but had to put back down because of it's 200 Dinar price tag. Ouch ouch. Also, I'm not the most fashionable person I know (far from it actually) and I can tell you that the definition of what's "fashionable" or "cool" in this country is really bland. Every girl here needs someone to tell her that she can dress however she wants and doesn't have to look like her 4 other friends who are walking in a herd in the Seef Mall. And by the way, not everyone can pull of red lipstick girls, not everyone...


As you can all see, I'm still in "adjusting" mode... Unfortunately, my other half (better half?) still hasn't come back so I'm feeling the pains of Bahrain alone, which feel magnified to the power of 100. A lot of things upset me and I've been trying to keep a positive outlook, which some of my friends find amusing and predict it to be short lived. I'll continue to keep positive, look at the bright things and I do continue to thank the powers above for everything I've got - it could be a lot worse... I'll continue to put down my thoughts, when I have time, so I can look back at this a couple of years down the line at laugh at how I feel at the moment. I'm looking forward to it.

No Ped Xings here

I got up from quick lunch at a Starbucks with a friend to head back to work one afternoon.

"Where's your car?" he asked as he picks up his Gucci shades and pulled out his Mont Blanc keyring.

"At the regency car park" I got up, adjusted myself and picked up my hand bag.

"Laish wagafteeha b3eeed min ihneey?" He asked, busy fiddling with his super cool new phone.

"Laish? That's where my parking spot is..."

"O Shlone yeetay?" we walked towards the door.

"Shino shlone? Meshait"

"You walked?!?!?!" He stops in his tracks, raises his eyebrows and mockingly drops his mouth open.

"Ee akeed" I stopped as well and knitted my eyebrows together. "Why should I drive for 15 minutes when I could walk for 5?"

He shook his head and put on his blinging shades.

"Ma7ad yamshi ihneey terra, 7u6i hai el shai fi balech"

Well Harumph to you too.

A picture can say a thousand words

Hey Sabooch, look at those idiots in the car taking a picture of us... pssssht... wasting their time when there's 50% off at Mango...

Keep walking ladies, I think I see the new extension in the distance!

Update This!

Ehhhh stolen internet again, this feels so good... thank you GOAT_WIRELESS* for bringing your unsecured network back into my life. Now I can go back to hours of useless web surfing when I really could be doing other things.



I've been busy and not at the same time. In the last 2 weeks I've

1. Left my old job


2. Went on an English Holiday and forgot about the polluted world


3. Had Real Cornish Clotted Cream Ice Cream


4. Saw a great play at a great venue


5. Saw an even greater concert at a much grander venue (MUSE AT WEMBLEY)


6. Became a Corporate Craving Slave


7. Started packing to go back home (half truth: the will is there, I can't bring myself to actually pack just yet)

I'd really love to elaborate on all of the above but right now Number 7 is apparently the most important. I know I'm going back home sometime fairly soon but I really can't bring myself to pack. It's the same sad feeling as just the thought of watching the final ever episode of Six Feet Under which is waiting for me in my DVD player - I just can't bring myself to do either, it's just so depressing. Anyway, it can't be that bad since I should be back in London by end of September to do yet another stint of hard work. So I'm not moving my whole life back just yet so I'm going to avoid the packing big for a little longer.

That's about it, I really don't feel like elaborating.

*Real wireless network connection name hidden for purposes which will allow me to continue using this free service until I leave. Like it or not, I'm stealing your internet buddy and there's nothing you can do to stop me. Not much longer left now.

2 More Days and I'm No Longer a FroggeyMan

It just hit me this morning that I will no longer be working here next week. Wow. And that I'm probably leaving London in about 2 weeks. Wow Wow.

I should take my stuff soon - the framed picture of my parents on my desk (Christmas Lunch 2005, R's house) and my CHOCOCAT flask (for my milk tea from home every morning). I should also close all my old case files and say my goodbyes to clients. Maybe plan a lunch on Friday. Steal some stationary. Tell a Boss how I really feel about her. Slap a co-worker. Kiss the delivery man. Whatever it is people do when they leave their job.

I'll figure it out shortly. I think the saddest thing will be saying goodbye to everyone, which I've been avoiding. Hmph.